skmo

since my last record, i have done jade body 3 times, yuan shen 3 times, scalp massage 1 time, jade woman 1 time, and 8 brocades 1 time.

the most recent time i did yuan shen was in a new park to me.  i was a bit distracted but my mind let go of distractions quickly with each, and my practice was powerful.

i did healing qigong for my mom's headache (the first time she's accepted my offer) and she was very responsive and her headache diminished then went away completely.  part way through treating her, i realized that her blockage was originating somewhere around her teeth, jaw, throat, so i drew from there up and out bai hui.  she immediately opened her eyes and said that she had a swift involuntary movement of "breath" that drew from the top of her throat up through her head.  i was so excited!!!  i told her to massage that area of her jaw/teeth if her headache came back.

this morning my right wrist was throbbing (arthritis) terribly as i was just gaining wakefulness.  i turned on my side and held my wrist with my left hand, focusing qi there and the pain went away within a few minutes.


 

Since I last journaled I have practiced Yuan Shen 10 times, Jade Body 6 times, Six Sounds Chanting Therapy 2 times, 1000 Hands Budha 1 time, and Scalp Massage 3 times.  I practiced at home in my room, at the park, at work, at the beach,  on a hike, and in an old church building at my family gathering.  I had several days off work over the Labor Day holiday and very much enjoyed Qigong everyday! 

I had a strange massage at the beach in which the LMT took way more energy from me than she gave.

I gathered stones at the ocean to do hot rock massage for Amie.

I shared Jade Body with interested family members at the Reunion.  Not one person felt comfortable doing the mantras.  I tried for only a minute to help Troy with his headache but too many people were making fun of us and he felt embarassed so I stopped.

amie and i did yuan shen in the park this morning.  i had not got all of the transitions between movements down yet, and some sections were still confusing, but i felt much more confident by the time we were done with the form in general. 

qigong in the park put us in the mood for duck noodle soup but we got sidetracked and ended up eating bejing hotpot.  good god it was scrumptious.

A few nights ago I did six sounds therapy.  I had been having some stomach troubles for a week or so and while I was doing the yellow visualization and sound for stomach spleen, a small area of my gut started hurting and pulling like a band.  it was a couple inches above my navel and to the left (my left).  I also did the meditation that follows 6 sounds.  I was worried about Gus being at the foot of my bed because the visualization at the end of this meditation is that negative energy leaves through your big toes.

A couple of nights ago while I was trying to sleep I was having a lot of anxiety--worrying about Amie starting this new program in a few weeks and about things that will be completely outside of my control.  (I've suffered a lot of insomnia and light/poor sleeping for the past few weeks.)  I was very angry with Amie.  My mind was spinning.  Then I did 5 mountain meditation and my continued to spin.  Then all at once I experienced a sudden letting go, a wave of acceptance, and nearly immediately fell asleep--unheard of for me when I'm having anxiety and insomnia.  In my dream that night, there was a young woman who was full of light and energy and she was present with me during the whole dream, she never spoke a word, but smiled a lot and was very connected to me.  then part way through the dream she was very pregnant.  i felt like she was enlightened somehow.  i woke up feeling much better emotionally.

Yesterday I went to the park before my acupuncture appointment and did Yuan Shen, Jade Body, Dragon Breathing, and Scalp Massage and following meditation.  Then I walked to acupuncture.  I talked to my acupuncturist about the anxiety, insomnia, constipation, and  pain in my stomach, and my cold.  He did some heat releasing points in my shoulders and neck and placed needles around bai hui, put one in my left foot, one to the right of my navel, and one in my navel. He rotated the needle in my navel in half-circle rotations for a minute or so while, at his suggestion, I focused my energy there moving out from the needle in concentric circles.  The needling point is apparently less important in this method than the needling technique and the participation of the patient in directing energy.  Then he left me with the needles and heat on my belly for 20 minutes or so.  When he came in to take out the needles I told him that the needling had caused my mouth to fill with saliva--he was excited because the point he needled in my foot was meant to increase fluid movement.  Then I explained that the point in my belly button eased pain and tightness in my belly as well as some fears I had been experiencing.  He explained that this point was on my kidney channel and also in some 5-element triangle heavy on earth energy.  It was an incredible appointment.  And after it my cold symptoms were almost completely gone.  I recovered a lot of energy.

on my lunchbreak thursday, july 31st by the greenhouse.  very good practice!  started with warm-ups.  love the heaven breathing and earth breathing movement (3).  having some difficulty with transitions, will check my papers. 

back at work debi was having troubles moving her head left to right.  asked her if she wanted me to try to help.  she said yes.  found out when she came in my office that they've discovered she has a slipped disk.  she's still hooked on vicadin, and had an epideral in her upper spine the day before i tried healing qigong.  she said that she felt pain during my treatment whereas she felt only numbness before (??) and that she wanted to come back again.

today debi asked if i could help her.  it turned out that my day was too busy.  i feel bad about it, but needed to get a lot done.

over the weekend amie and i did qigong warm ups and the first part of yuan shen at a park.  strange--i had some sense during the practice that there'd been serious "power struggles" on that land.  curious about what kind of conflict that might have been.  also cool that in the grove of trees we started practicing in we were under a tree that was home to an owl.  pellets all over underfoot full of bones and feathers.

today i went to my brother's house at 6:30 a.m. and practiced warm ups, yuan shen then jade body while he meditated.  turns out qigong may be too noisy to practice while someone meditates.  we may try again.

amie was bit by several mosquitos on saturday and her bites became very red and swollen almost instantly. her ankle became so swollen that you could barely see the bone on the outside.  i did qigong several times over all of the swelling.  while treating the bite on her leg, my hand kept drifting to a spot nearby the bite.  i told her this and she said that the spot is a serious spleen point. . .don't know the significance of this but might try to find out.

yesterday morning amie and i went to a park near our home and did the walking qigong, shi shi whoo, for the lungs.  like last time, it hurt my sinuses a lot.  dr. liu dong says that practice is good for allergies and for balancing the emotions.  we also did warm ups then started yuan shen but had to run home to pee.

i met a group of 6 other ling gui students at laurelhurst today: steve, joel, joyce, katherine, the guy from dallas whose name i don't remember and a 4th or 5th year student i've never met. we did yuan shen twice.  i like this form more and more.  got clarification on the last two movements.  the group also started wu wei--i tried this form for a minute or two but since i don't really have it down, haven't found any love for it yet, and needed to meet amie for breakfast, i left before the group wrapped up.

yesterday i was so excited about the new qigong forms, meditations, and warm ups i learned at the retreat that on my lunch hour i used an empty conference room to do warm ups, yuan shen qigong, and dragon and tiger forms.  then when i got home i did scalp massage and its finishing meditation and then jade body qigong with amie.  after jade body i felt very charged.  amie asked if i would work on her painful tail bone and i was glad to do it as my hands were very energized.  this is the first time i've done qigong before the hands-energy work that i've begun and the difference was significant.  my intention was focused and there was a lot of energy flowing from my hands immediately.  i felt an urge to pulse my hands toward and away from her spine then after a while put my hands on her back and made stretching pulsing movements on along a 6 inch section of her spine.  this is the first time i've felt like putting my hands on someone in the process of moving energy.  i also felt at one point that i was "drawing out" and at that moment amie asked me if i was doing so.  i've not had that impression before and i felt nervous all of a sudden and distracted.  so i stopped what i was doing, breathed into my hands, shook them onto the plant by the bed, and ran cold water over them.  (i don't know why but running water on my hands feels good and right after i have been doing intense energy moving.) after that i rubbed chinese red flower on her back.  then i went onto the deck and did dragon breathing as a liver cleanse.  amie's back and tailbone felt light and without pain.  this morning her back was still pain-free. 

i'm hoping that as i continue my qigong practice and progress in the school i will have better language to talk about what it is that is going on with my hands.  i do feel confident that qigong is the right practice for cultivating whatever urge and propensity i am responding to.  it would also be really great to talk with someone who has similar experiences.  i realized today that qigong and this "healing urge" started in the same time frame about a year ago. . .hadn't made that connection before today.  am remembering that the first time was in response to amie's headache, then an urge to help birdy's cyst, and then my computer!!  i'm excited about this journey and wonder where i'm going.

Today was the second day of Ling Gui summer retreat.  I am exhausted physically. . .too tired to write but I want to jot down a couple of ideas in a bulleted list so I can say more later.  we learned a walking qigong this morning for lungs and one for heart.  I don't remember the masters whose style we learned but will find out.  the rhythm is shi shi wu, shi shi wu. and shi shi shi shi wu wu wu.  shi is an inhale and wu is an exhale.  (maze of walkers)

-yuan shen qigong
-jade body review
-lecture on yuan shen (original qi), shi shen (heart/mind qi), yu shen (desire, liver) 

more later!

On Monday the 14th I did self-massage and Jade Body on my lunch break under a tree.  I for some reason have felt compelled to do Qigong facing South since summer began.  The practice was good.  I followed the practice with massaging my knee and directing qi and intention to it.  On Tuesday the 15th I also did Jade Body. 

Yesterday was the first day of the Ling Gui summer retreat.  Dr. Lui Dong gave a lecture on Yuan Shen Qigong and we learned the first 4 movements of that form. . .will write more later as I'm out the door now for day two!

July 11, 2008

In April I started the Teacher Training Program at the Ling Gui International Healing Qigong School.  At that time I began a paper diary of my practice.  Because my handwritten entries tend to be sketchy and because I feel better able to express myself when writing with a computer, I’ve decided to pick up LiveJournal again, as a sort of Qigong practice log.

I practiced Jade Body this evening.  I started out on the upstairs deck, but it was too windy so I moved to the yard.  I discovered last week that if I practice in the wind I feel like I “leak” or waste a lot of energy and I have a difficult time keeping track of the sequences.  Tonight, when gathering Qi during the “Buddha washes his body” sequence, the smell of earth below me filled my senses and brought the yellow color from my practice of “Six Sounds Therapy” with it.  Its curious to me that this seems to be one of the movements that is often accompanied by a sensation or visualization for me.  A couple of weeks ago during the same sequence, I "saw" that I was pulling up small smooth stones, like river rocks.  I do not know what this means.

i’ve had no room in my head or time in my work days of late to update LJ. but here’s making a go of it. . .(oops, i’ve just interrupted this entry by keying a list of things i should be doing instead. for your enjoyment, the list has been removed. if oogling over the to-do lists of others gives you pleasure or relief, please supply an e-mail address and i will make your day.)  

my thoughts are dropping all twirlly like marbles, hard and scattered. . .

my brother is having surgery on his foot at this moment. because he regularly boasts that HE is NEVER sick (emphasis designed to illuminate my persistent state of ailing,) i’m certain he’s poised, leg-up, for a rough round.

i’m pale as a ghost and people here are talking about it.

my parents have been car camping for a month in beef-eating texas and are hanging on to their new veganism by thin strands of organic kelp harvested off the pacific coast by oregon kayakers then laid to sun-dry on our ocean beaches. sleeping in their car in freezing weather (with head colds,) finding nothing to eat save those who recently considered the world from two eyes, and tiring of the inarguably big, backward ways of texans, they’ve decided to get the hell out of dodge and are making their way home this weekend.

i stunk up the kitchen this week in an unsuccessful attempt to sprout radish, broccoli, and quinoa seeds. four days later and a counter-top full of rotting seeds, i learned, in true eskimo fashion (mocking by a loved one,) that sprouting seeds are meant to be rinsed and DRAINED twice a day. turns out bacteria do swimmingly well eating and pooping away their days in tepid, standing water. seeds do not.

i’ve found this wonderful card by ryo tagaki and am going to give it to my girl today. . .the sun is low and the vibe is piquant with a twist of love-ache like the slow-life walking weekend days we spend together.  plus she thinks persimmons are lovely.

A half-hour in direct sunshine then swaying and shakin'it to Heddalee's Hopscotch Radio. . .i'm smiling now and feeling sweet happy good-afternoon baby happy.

alright, i've done it for true. gone veganplusfish and avoided wheat for two weeks now! am amazed at how delicious meat- dairy- wheat-less food can be! sunday night i made an outstanding quinoa loaf from broccoli, parsnips, onions, potatoes, rice n oat flour, sunflower seeds, soy lecithin, miso, and quinoa of course. it was so fresh my dad called me swooning over the half-loaf we shared with him. and yesterday my mom, who's on board too, made the most tummy-warming, creamy comforting bowl of cauliflower soup i've ever tasted--using sesame tahini as the fat and oatmeal as the gluten.

i'm a true believer in humans being meat-eaters. a believer too that the current relationship between most lower-48 meat/animal product-eaters and the animals they exploit is sick and ugly and i want way out. my understanding of this has been developing for about fifteen years and is all mine--it's a powerful thing to feel right in my skin about something that's caused me a lot of shame and anxiety.

my value of respectfully giving and receiving gifts is still a strong one though and i doubt i'll turn down animal products offered me by one of my elders. hopefully they will understand and respect my choices though and not offer me any meat. another decision i'll need to make is whether to eat meat from animals raised by my family members or other local farmers when we gather for yearly family celebrations. hmmnnn. . .i'm up for the challenge of negotiating these choices!

as for the fish, i have enough access to fisher-people through my family and work that i’ll be enjoying a little smoked salmon a couple times a week. plus, i have very little problem with the relationship between fisher-people and the wild- line-caught fish they catch and kill.

here’s to a happy consience! and my cracking fingers (so much cooking, so many dishes) are crossed for good health in this big decision.

My flyer for Hedda's Missing Gladys